Quick and Easy Tutorial on How-to-spend-a-night-in-the-slammer in the United States.


Step 1: Wake up 10 minutes before you are supposed to be at Phoenix airport, so you can forget most of your documents while you try to phone the cab, tuck in your shirt and pop in a chewing gum (did I talk about brushing?)


Step 2: Proudly show your new IP to airport security, so that you get more and more confident about not having to show your passport anywhere.


Step 3: Promptly dump your IP and passport somewhere in the kitchen after reaching San Antonio.


Step 4: Make travel plans to a place which is at least 8 hours by car. (If you want to go to some place far like New Orleans as I initially planned, wait for an advanced tutorial). Also make sure that it is near someplace like Mexico.


Step 5: Take all your luggage with you(minus the useless stuff you dumped in the kitchen).


Step 6: Have a lot of fun at South Padre coz we have work to do on the way back (the gods are really laughing now).


Step 7: At a federal checkpoint proudly show your I-20 and look sheepish when you are told that you need some state ID to cross the checkpoint. Someone has to drive 8 hours to get the "useless stuff" you dumped in the kitchen.


Step 8: Bravo, if you have followed steps 1-6, you are now the proud occupant of a 12ft by 8ft steel cell with a glass window, combination water fountain-cum-toilet, steel rack and closed-circuit-cameras!


Step 9: Brag about it.


© 2003 Anil Kumar. All rights reserved. Any further questions on this subject will be charged @ $5 per question.